O! The Slander! Even my close friend in whom I trusted

who ate my bread - she has lifted her heel against me.

I have told two, maybe three people about the details of S's insanity (You, of course don't count. Because you don't really exist. At least not in a sense of running into you from time to time). Her bitterness and belligerent indignation have not found their way into most of my conversations. To wit: on Saturday the kids and I took a lovely long drive northwards to enjoy the graduations of a few old friends (one a former student of mine getting her B.A.; the other, a high school pal who is now fully PhD'd). On the way we stopped by for a surprise visit at the home of some old friends from our mountain days. As we were leaving, Mr. D. asked me to tell S. that they missed seeing her. I confided that things were not going well, that she had checked out of the marriage at least six months ago. I left it at that.

S., on the other hand, sees it as her duty to lay out her low opinion of me and my shortcomings whenever remotely tangential to the conversation. She wrote a former coworker with concerns that in his new position he was slandering his old school and stealing prospective students. He politely defended his actions in black and white, but S. felt somehow violated: "To be honest, I thought I totally pissed you off with my email. Your response felt like an attack." [Phew! At least I am not the only human being who wears the calumnies of her bizarre interpretations of human emotions.] But not one to stop there, she needs to tell this man where the roots of such paranoia lie: "I have a feeling it's because I've been dealing with a lot of this from my husband for so many years and never respond well to any hint of harshness."

Do I know this guy? Is he some longstanding family friend? A Christian able to dispense grace, pray or hear with wisdom? Ahhhhhhh - NO. I notice in her correspondence that she brings up "troubles with" her husband on a regular basis - she might as well program that into her signature S. L. T______, "Things with my husband are difficult."


Contend, O Lord, with those who contend with me;
fight against those who fight against me!

It is one thing to bare your heavy soul with trusted old friends who have spiritual resources (although I even have a hard time with that when I am entirely left out of the loop, unable to temper her aspersions with some perspective. One woman told S. that she is "doing all the right things and the Lord will honor that in your life". Quite a statement from someone without much knowledge of events), but to speak ill of your husband - a fellow heir of salvation - before the goyim! Such foolishness is this!

Let them be put to shame and dishonor
who seek after my life!
Let them be turned back and disappointed
who devise evil against me!
Let them be like chaff before the wind,
with the angel of the Lord driving them away!
Let their way be dark and slippery,
with the angel of the Lord pursuing them!